Letting Go
By: Amy Swank, Director, Parent & Family Relations
Letting Go is about exactly that, letting go. At the least, it is about letting go of your child as they go off to college and honestly begin their adventure of self-discovery and development. At a deeper level, it is about how you, as parents and as a family, decide how you are going to handle this new stage of life. To be honest, I would say as parents and family members, we have been letting go for a long time. I’m blessed to be a mom myself, and I have been thinking a lot on the topic of letting go. This summer, we took our 10-year-old son off to summer camp for a week, and as much as I think I have my stuff together and talk with college families about the topic of letting go, I failed Letting Go 101. When my son gave me my final hug (1 of 10), he hugged me a little tighter this time and I was certain that it was a cry for help. As the week dragged on, I found myself thinking of all the times that, as a mother, I had already let me kids go. The first time I had let go was dropping them off at child care. From there, I let go of hands to start first steps, I let go of the back of the bicycle as they peddled away, then it was off to school and letting them go off to kindergarten, where I cried more as they walked away than they did. Now I’m in the stages of summer camps and junior high school and next will be high school, dances and learning to drive and before I know it, I’ll be you and letting go one more time.
Your son or daughter will be doing something they have wanted to do for a long time. Remember, while this pent-up anticipation is now going to be achieved, they have no experience with it.
At the same time, you as a parent/family may have no, or little experience with this process, as well.
Take a deep breath and try to be open to whatever comes next in this new stage of life.
Please remember that college students are our business. We do this all the time, year after year. Believe it or not, your Zag will not be the first homesick college student on the planet. Your child will not be the first to suffer through an entire day with a broken hair straightener. And, even though EVERYONE else has an iPhone 6, a 5s will work just fine.
Talk with them. Tell them of your excitement, your sadness, your fears. Let them know they will be missed. At the same time, let them know they will be making more decisions now. This is their college education and they need to take responsibility for that. You as a family, and we as professionals, are here to guide them through the maze of experiences that college offers. But remember, it is their growth we are focused upon, and we are helping them to learn how to solve the issues presented to them on their own.
With all that being said, we believe establishing this relationship with parents and family members is an important component of a successful college experience for Zag students. We want to establish a collaborative spirit between you and the University for the common goal of helping your student develop and succeed. We value you as a partner in your student’s educational process.
To stay connected and informed, visit our website gonzaga.edu/parents which is designed to be your main source for information. Our office is dedicated to serve as your portal for communication and to publish relevant news and information on a timely basis. We will ensure that you know how to connect with valuable resources and services to facilitate your involvement in and support of your student. You can also follow us on Facebook (Gonzaga Families), Twitter (@gonzagafamilies), and Instagram (GonzagaFamilies).
This is the beginning of an exciting time, and we are honored that your student has chosen Gonzaga as their home for the next few years!