Welcoming Your Student Home After the Election

By: The Center for Cura Personalis

Our students are once again entering the final days of their fall semester and planning their return home for the winter holidays. These final days are marked with stress of registration, final projects and looming deadlines. This semester also coincided with one of the most divided presidential elections in the history of our country.  For some students, this may add to their stress of returning home.

For many of them, this election marked their first chance to vote for a presidential candidate. This election stirred deeply held emotions amongst everyone; some students will continue to feel, process and experience those emotions all the way home. As parents, family members and as a Gonzaga community we must allow and encourage our students to do this hard work of unpacking, and reflecting on what the election means for them, even if they return home with different perspectives on the world. Their liberal arts education constantly challenges them to think more critically about the world around them, and to engage with their own values and belief systems as they progress through their four years here. Our Jesuit foundations also calls on them to reflect on the presence of God in each and every person they meet.

As the biggest source of support for most of our students, parents and family members play a key role in creating safe spaces for recharge and reflection. Some of our students may not need to discuss politics at all.  Others may need the opportunity to ask questions, discuss concerns and emotions, positive or negative.  As parents, families, community members and most of all, supporters of our students, we must listen to their thoughts, engage with them on their concerns and assist them with examining the broader picture. We can provide them examples on living out our values and virtues in all times, including approaching sensitive topics with dignity. We can show our students how to find God in all things and in every person, even if we disagree with them. Most of all, we must continue to love our students, no matter what. Some of your students may return home with very different political beliefs than when they left for college. Some may have voted for a candidate, initiative or proposal different from your own. Regardless of their votes and views they remain our children. They remain our students. They remain a key part of the Gonzaga community and story. In the midst of such divisiveness and distrust across our country, let us model how to move forward and how to lead with love.

Quick Tips

• Let your student steer the conversation. Some students do not feel the need to discuss the election and some will. Let them bring it up if they want to talk about it.
• Ask questions about their concerns, joys, confusion and results. This will allow them to reflect and think critically.
• Allow them to share their opinions, thoughts and feelings in an open environment.
• Place boundaries on the conversation. For some families this may mean not talking about politics on Christmas Eve, for some it means limiting the discussion time. Make sure to express those boundaries before beginning the conversation, and engage your student in being an active part of establishing these boundaries.
• Encourage your student to continue to examine their beliefs, even if those may differ from the ones they were raised with. This is a time of discovery and independence.